[Budgie]

Stoner convo's being what they are , I was chatting over the luchtime spliif about who's got the worst, or should that be Best Farts? Men or Women, Parent, Offspring, Gramps, Pet-Dogs and thought I'd see what the truth really is!!

 

So , purely for shit n giggles, vote who, in for your personal, directly absorbed, felt, comatosed, gip-inducing, side-splitting experience, is the deserving holder of the Human Farting Crown.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A little quip about why you voted how you did isn't mandatory, but I do like to think that farting, deeep deeep down, IS after all about sharing........

 

 

In longstanding respect for the best bottom burps, I'll leave this poll open to run indefinitely

[mrsDeeks]

sso hard for me to vote Deeks is awful and awfully proud of them to but so is my youngest princess she gladly announces that that awful smell is hers to make daddy proud

 

mine smell of flowers and they are fairy puffs in privacy 

[Mrs Willy]

My uncles were the worst farts ive ever smellt.

Serious smells that penetrate concrete walls.

He lived on fryups, guinness and 50 capstain filterless per day.

Died at 54 , no wonder.

[Dekay]

Ah its in the genetics a very great man once said the smell is developed over many thousands of years of active bottomed members of families, I think these rather smelly people are also very proud of themselves and that brings me to a conversion I had in chat

@  GoodBudgie : (Fri, 00:45)  just imaging/lip-farting "pint of lager please" and it works too @  dekay : (Fri, 00:44)  i can nearly say words with mine bet by pension age bea ble to order a pint with it with a slight rasping sound @  dekay : (Fri, 00:43)   Back to front the conversation btw

I dont think I evre grew up past the anal stage as frued called it the fascination and ability to control the anus and all it does 

I do believe my youngest daughter can easily match my fart aroma (lets call it) and she doesnt drink alcohol, this being a quite major factor in how the smell develops means she probably now more potent than me and whence she drinks it will be me who leavs the room first

[W.S]

Voted for myself, as my insides are fucked and for some reason I fart all the fucking time!

This leads to extra stinky mofo's when I'm packing the protein lol

[mrsDeeks]

Ah its in the genetics a very great man once said the smell is developed over many thousands of years of active bottomed members of families, I think these rather smelly people are also very proud of themselves and that brings me to a conversion I had in chat

@  GoodBudgie : (Fri, 00:45)  just imaging/lip-farting "pint of lager please" and it works too @  dekay : (Fri, 00:44)  i can nearly say words with mine bet by pension age bea ble to order a pint with it with a slight rasping sound @  dekay : (Fri, 00:43)   Back to front the conversation btw

I dont think I evre grew up past the anal stage as frued called it the fascination and ability to control the anus and all it does 

I do believe my youngest daughter can easily match my fart aroma (lets call it) and she doesnt drink alcohol, this being a quite major factor in how the smell develops means she probably now more potent than me and whence she drinks it will be me who leavs the room first

 

So we agree the lil princess deeks wins in this house

[Dekay]

I added another option

 

[Dekay]

So we agree the lil princess deeks wins in this house

 

Princess parp

[Budgie]

I will have to vote for children.

 

It's the constant attack that finally swung it. With the added stylish....panache is the only word I can use of my 9yrs old son. Hats off to the little bugger , he's got my genes and then some. Although his mum could let rip big-stylee so the combo was almost bound to be lethal, and from the two phenos of kids I've had, it is the younger male of the species who does it best, and makes me ever so slightly proud in the process, I'll never lose him because a 15 minute listen out and there's usually a distant rumble, followed by a gipping sound. Better than echo location on a bat I tell you. This evening, sat on opposite ends of the sofa from me, watching movie we were, him legs up and slightly tucked (in perfect target sight of you know who) and he let one rip, mid-tone with a deeper fading finsih, about 8 seconds long. I could almost see the vapours roll accross the middle seat. And it hit, as expected about 2 second later. JeeezesH. But, as the topper, he slowly turned his head away from the TV, narrow eyed, slightly disgusted - as if it was his dad wot did it - look on his face and just slowly shook his head, then slowly turn away busrting into giggles TOP BOMBING

[WanderinBloke]

The Unknown Assailants are always canny. I've made a person so disgusted that they shouted in the aisle in Asda, "JESUS CHRIST". It's moments like that which make shopping bearable.

 

The boot was on the other foot when shopping another time. Standing in the queue I noticed a little old lady making her way up n down the queue as if looking for a way in. The brits did the brit thing and bunched together a bit so she had to go to the back So she walks up, looks at me with a glint inher eye, cocks her leg, farts and wanders away.

 

Little old lady 1 - WB 0